HOLD ME

send me songs to calm the raging storm in my soul

hold my hand and i’ll hold yours as we venture out

into the forest while everyone else gets blinded by the city lights;

our fingers intertwined and feelings starting to understand

how out names taste from each other’s mouth

pull me close, never let go until the sun forgets to rise

and moon blooms with the quiet night

#excerptfromthebookimightwrite 😛

FORGETTING

We don’t forget entirely.

We always have a feeling about a situation we can no longer recall to our memory.

We might not be able to remember it, but it’s that feeling that gives you juat enough to know.

It’s like you forgot the movie but you remember the trailer.

CRIME SCENE (excerpt)

“You started the mosaic out of me. You just found the right pieces to put into place. I was your masterpiece you were determined to finish. Soon you made me into a museum full of mosaics, of miracles, and other happy things. I was covered in colors, and started helping with your masterpiece too. But then you shattered the ones that were simply glass and refused to put them back together. Instead, you turned me into a museum of tattered masterpieces, of tragedies, and other broken things. You pried my heart open like the doors of closed convenience store, not taking one single thing, but destroying everything instead. You left me like an abandoned house, a ghost town with only a resident. You left me for road to kill. The thought of your touch gives me third degree burns and you left a crime scene where my heart used to be.”

“I told the cops you had killed somebody. They asked me for a proof. They asked me for the crime scene. But the crime scene was me. I told them you ripped me. How you ripped out my heart and burned me and destroyed my mind. They told me it wasn’t true, but it was.”

“You killed the person I used to be”

Excerpt from the book i might or i might not write

TIME

Time.

They say thay time can heal all wounds

Time is going by and there’s nothing you can do to stop it.

Years will pass and you’ll feel like you’re stuck.

The older you get, the faster it goes.

Eventually, time will leave you behind.

You can never relieve the past.

You can never prevent the future.

The end is hurtling towards you.

The more time that passes, the less you have left.

Time runs out.

Time is unforgiving.

We could die, anytime

At any given moment, we could die.

There could be an accident, a crash, the whole word could explode.

The worst part would not be dying

it would be

dying with the regret and saying

“I wish I did that…”

Live your life to the fullest!

TO MY FUTURE LOVE

You.

There will be times when I will do nothing but love you very much unconditionally. However there will also be times when I am a raging river who will use the force of a powerful current to push you away from me and drag you underwater.

I will tell you I love you a hundred times a day, but I will only fill those words with so much feeling when you’re fast asleep and cannot hear the words I say.

I will have moments when I will not want to touch you, in fear that I will burn you if I do.

I will have moments when I can’t get enough of you.

I won’t tell you if I am filled with sadness or anger, so I am sorry if I expect you to just hug me when I feel this way.

I will not want your sympathy, yet I will want your understanding.

I may have days when I will not let you touch my scars, because they will remind me of how terrible I am, even if you will call them beautiful.

There will be days when I will shut you out with force of thousand suns

There will be days when I will share a light on ever aspect of my life.

I wish you will be able to understand me. I will make you understand me. I will do the same.

I will argue with you but I will never nag on you.

For all of this, I am deeply sorry.

But once I decided to break down my walls,

I will love you with everything I have, and I hope that that is enough to make you stay.

So wherever you are, please do not let anyone or anything kill your laughter. Do not turn your smile into frown. Instead, laugh and smile freely until the day we meet. I cannot dry your tears or embrace you right now, so please take care of yourself. I hope you look at what’s inside the heart of people.

I am praying for you. I will love you whoever you are.
I’m cautious of where my heart lands and I pray that it’s safe in your hands.

I love you to the stars.

Love,

Janine.